Alma 24:30

"And this we can plainly discern, that after a people have been once enlightened by the Spirit of God, and have had great knowledge of this pertaining to righteousness, and then have fallen away into sin and transgression, they become more hardened, and thus their state becomes worse than though they had never known these things."

As I mentioned in my last post, I've been struggling a lot with doing the things I know I should be doing. I feel like I'm not only failing in Scripture studies and personal prayers; I feel like I'm failing in other areas as well. I feel like I'm struggling with reverence. I feel like I'm struggling with Sabbath Day observance. I feel like I'm not making the best choices.
With these challenges, and the consequential reduction of prayers and scripture study on my behalf, I feel like more questions have arisen. I feel like I'm questioning things I once felt sure about. And the timing of this could not be any worse.
I've started working on my mission papers, and because of all these struggles I'm having, I feel like I'm doubting whether I can be an effective missionary. I'm questioning whether I can do this. Part of me thinks that this is exactly what the adversary would have me believe. He wants me to feel like a failure.
And I guess that's why that verse spoke to me today. If I allow the adversary to creep in, if I allow him to lead me away, I can expect to have a harder life than the one I had before I was a member. I can expect to face to worse from my Heavenly Father. He is more forgiving to those who have transgressed without knowledge of His full gospel than He is to those who knew it and have forsaken it. I don't want to be one of those people is slow to remember their Father. I don't want to become one of those people who slips away. I know I need to make some changes in my life; and that starts by putting Him first AGAIN. Somewhere along the lines I let Him go from my first priority to another number on my list. And that has got to change.
It's been said by some that if you aren't progressing, then you are retrogressing. This whole experience has taught me that that is true.
But you know what else I've learned? Experiences like this may be a test of faith, but these are the types of experiences that bring you closer to the Father and the Savior. I wouldn't have joined the Church without an experience like this because that experience humbled me. I didn't think I needed religion until I had nothing else to fall back on but what little faith I had. While these experiences are challenging in the moment, the weight of the load can be made lighter through Jesus Christ. And, my goodness, I'm truly grateful for that!

Grateful for Temples and Temple Ordinances

Wow. It's been a while since I've posted anything here. Not to say that nothing has happened, because a lot of exciting stuff has happened since my last post, but I guess between all the writing in my journal, in letters to friends, and in emails to my missionary friends, I neglected my blog. Haha.
So, be prepared, because this is gonna be a long one!

In early March, I was interviewed by my Bishop for a temple recommend on temple grounds. What an incredible experience! I had my eyes shifting between him and the main entrance of the temple, knowing that soon I would get to cross over that sacred threshold. After we had both signed the recommend, he said my countenance had immediately changed, and that both the temple and I were glowing. I could feel it from the inside. I felt overjoyed and full of life in that moment. 

Flash forward a few weeks, and I'm finally being interviewed by my stake president. He had been away for a few weeks on a family vacation. It always amazes me that he knows who I am since I'm a convert and I didn't grow up in the Church. He interviewed me at the church building during our three hour block. Bishop Patron actually came to pull me out of the temple prep class to meet with President Jex. When I went back to class, everyone knew that I had my recommend all ready to go. I was so excited!

Bishop Patton and his wife were going to a wedding in Gilbert, Arizona; they invited me to go with them. They suggested I receive my endowments there, and then witness the sealing of their friend with them. I was all for it! We tried to arrange it with my Sisternaries, Kemp and Olsen, who were both home now from their missions. But it didn't really work out for them, so I told myself, "well, I could still go without them; but it wouldn't be the same." Besides, the ordinance is the same no matter where you go, so, it really didn't matter where I went so long as I had my friends there with me. Being the first member in my family, I knew that this was an experience I would not get to share with my family; so it was important to me that I got to share it with friends. 

Kemp was coming down to California for a week during her spring break anyway, so I thought it would be best to just arrange to go to the temple then. I decided on Friday, the 17th of April because Kemp would be here then; Sister Moore would be at the temple for her departing trip anyway, and I really wanted to see her, too! Olsen said she would make it down for that, and made arrangements, and every thing was good to go! 

Or so I thought! Turns out I would have a midterm on the 17th. I had to push my 9:00am session to the next one at 1:00pm; which meant I wouldn't get to see Sister Moore anymore. And then my professor said that if your last name was "A-J," you would take it from 9:30-10:30; and if your last name was "M-Z," you would take it from 10:30-11:30. I was freaking out because I was supposed to be at the temple at 11:30. But my professor allowed me to take it with the first group. She showed up late, and I was worried it would effect my punctuality. I imagined that if I was late to the temple, that I would have to do it later. I don't know if that's true because I ended up making to the temple by 10:45. I think my midterm went relatively well. I probably rushed through it, but I felt like I knew 90% of the material. 

When I got to the temple, I walked around a bit, and then met up with the Pattons, Kemp, Olsen, and another former SFV return missionary, Cottrell, at the Visitors' Center, and we kind of just killed some time by watching some videos there. 

By 11:15 we all figured we should start walking towards the temple. Kemp and Olsen wanted to take some pictures first. I'm not a fan of being in pictures because I feel like I usually end up looking stupid. Haha especially since my glasses always show a glare. But I indulged them. Haha 

When we went to the temple, all the workers there were super friendly. And they kept saying that it was all about me, and that I was a VIP, and so on; which made me a little uncomfortable because I'm not used to being the center of attention. Hahaha. But it wasn't so bad. Overall, they were just super friendly, so, I figured they probably do that for all own-endowment temple guests. 

Putting on my garments was the greatest feeling ever. I immediately felt the power that they have, and I have never felt so beautiful as I did in that moment. I did my initiatory, and after getting dressed, went to sit with Kemp and Olsen while we waited to hear from the temple matron. I tried to take it all in, and tried to process all that was said and promised to me. It was kind of overwhelming, but in a good way! 

When the three of us started talking, I felt so grateful to have them on either side of me. Here were two young ladies who traveled across a few state lines to be there with me, two young ladies who I admire and look up to, and who helped me to grow from the train wreck of a person I was before. I couldn't help but think that this was the way it was supposed to be. Not to say that it was destiny, because I don't believe in that, but I believe that God has a plan for us. Of course, our agency, our choices, can either get us closer or further away from His plan for us. I believe that me being at the temple with my missionaries was part of His plan for me. 

When we went up to the Creation room, and waited for the rest of the people to join us, I saw Sister Moore for a bit! It was awesome! I mean, I just waved to her from across the room, because she was leaving; so, I didn't really see her, but even that felt like a huge blessing!

When the session started, I felt so grateful that I had read the Book of Moses. It helps to understand so much! The whole time, I felt grateful that a member of the temple presidency allowed both Kemp and Olsen to be my escorts. Hahaha. Not to say that either of them was (or were?) lacking in their escorting abilities, but I had twice the amount of help, and I definitely felt like I needed it. Haha.

Upon crossing the veil, I felt a rejoicing in my heart because I made it into the Celestial room, a place I've been longing to go since that life-changing experience in the Gilbert, Arizona temple. And I saw a bunch of familiar faces standing in a half-circle, waiting for me. And that sight made me so happy, I felt like I could cry. But I didn't. Not a half a second later, I realize I was the center of attention again, and felt uncomfortable again, and I didn't know what to do, so I just said, "hi." And they all softly laughed at me. Haha I guess that's not normal. Everyone kept asking me how I felt, and I didn't even know how to put it into words. It's this incredible, slightly overwhelming, slightly confusing, but a mostly joyous experience. When you're in the temple, you start to realize just how much The Lord loves each and every one of us. I don't think I'll ever fully comprehend that love He has for us in this lifetime, but I know that through continual attendance to the temple, I can understand more, a little bit at a time.

Anyway, a few days later, I felt impressed to check my ancestry.com profile, as it's been a while since the last time I logged on. I had a few hints to review. My grandfather's name came up on a 1930 Mexican Census done in Sinaloa. The other names listed in that household matched the names of his parents. So, I asked my mom if her dad's family had ever lived in Sinaloa, and she said, "no, his family is from Jalisco, Guadalajara." And I was so confused, because as far as I had known, my mom's side of the family is from Durango, and Guadalajara has never been mentioned for my mom's side of the family. So, I was nearly heartbroken about it. I went back to look at the census, and looked at the other names in that household, and asked her if he had any siblings, and she started listing off the same ones that were on the Census. So, I asked again, "are you sure they never lived in Sinaloa?" And she was like, "OHHH!! Haha. I thought you were asking about your dad. Yes, they did."

So, I was able to take the names of my great-grandparents to the temple on the 23rd. As I was waiting for my turn in to the baptismal font, I sat there and just had the strongest impression that my great-grandparents were there with me. I could feel that they were pleased that I had joined the Church because it meant that they could have the work done for them now. And I felt overwhelmed with the Spirit, and I put my head down in my hands, and I just started crying and silently laughing in my happiness.
Something I realized yesterday, as I was sitting in sacrament meeting, listening to all the testimonies being given, was that I didn't cry when I was baptized, and I didn't cry when I received my endowments; but I did cry when I had that experience with my great-grandparents in the baptistery. I didn't realize it then, but I'm sure that I cried because these ordinances weren't just for me or about me; they were about my family. Yes, it's great that I joined the Church; in fact, it was the best decision I've ever made. And people are constantly telling me that my posterity will forever be grateful for me and the decision I've made, because I was the first; but I know that both sides of my family, both past, and future, are grateful for that. My children will be born in the Covenant, if I marry a solid member of the Church whom I can go and be sealed to in the temple for time and all eternity. And I know that (some, if not all of) my ancestors are desperately waiting for their turn to have the ordinances done for them. Finding them is going to be the hard part, but I know that I'll have help along the way!
So, this past Thursday, the 30th, I took my great-grandmother's name upstairs to do her initiatory. As I sat there waiting for my turn, I was thinking about the experience I had had the week before. And I started wondering, "how can I make it so that every name I am baptized for is that special to me? What can I do differently so that every person I'm being baptized for is that important to me?" And that's when it hit me; I went in with a different mentality because it was the name of a family member. I treated that name differently because I was her descendant. While I know I'm not actually related to the name I'm usually baptized for, I know that they are family members of someone. And I know that they are Spirit children of a Heavenly Father, as am I. And in that way, we are related. So, after I finished doing initiatories, I went back downstairs to the baptistery, and this week, I had been feeling a little under the weather; so, I didn't do baptisms. But I did do confirmations. Before they started, I reminded myself that these names were my Sisters from a Heavenly Mister, that these were the names of my Spirit family members. And boy, did that make a difference! I could feel that the veil was thin, and that they were full of gratitude towards me, for the fact I changed the way I looked at it, for the fact that I was not longer looking at it as some random people who died ages ago, but that I was now looking at it as my long lost relatives. There's a saying, "change your attitude, and you can change your life." I know that the same is true for the temple ordinances, only, if you change your attitude, you might change your experience. Not to say that you're going to have an amazing experience every time,  but I know it has helped me.

The temple has been such a huge blessing to me from the beginning. I know that it turbo-charged my conversion process. Haha. I have no doubts that I would still be a member today even if I had not gone on that temple trip last winter; but I think it'd would've taken me a lot longer to make that decision. I know that God gave me that amazing and overwhelming spiritual experience because He knew it would take a lot to convince me; I am pretty stubborn, after all. I think He knew that had I not gone on that temple trip, my investigating would have probably taken months.

Looking back at my life, I think it's funny that the things that I am internally fighting so hard are the things I end up loving the most. The harder I try to push away or distance myself from something, the more it means to me in the long run. I can say that about my travel experiences, I can say that about certain sports and activities, I can say that relationships, and now, I can say that about the Church. The "Mormon Church" literally weirded me out; I wanted NOTHING to do with it. I only bothered letting those Elders in because I didn't want to be rude. I was too afraid of being mean to them, that I couldn't bring myself to tell them I was not interested. And there were things about the Church that I had issues with. But I kept my very different opinions to myself, for the most part; but inside, I was struggling. I knew the way I felt in my heart, but the way I was thinking wasn't agreeing with what I was feeling. My intellectual side was fighting with my emotional reaction to the Church, But I started reading the Book of Mormon, and I attempted to give it a real chance, and I started praying; and slowly but surely, the intellectual side and the emotional side of me were agreeing. And then I had that experience in the Gilbert temple, and I knew that this was right. I knew that this was another one of those things that I fought against so hard, and that I would end up loving. And it has been. It has been such a blessing to me; and I cannot and do not want to imagine my life from here on out without the Church in it. Letting the Elders in that day in December 2013 was literally the best decision I have ever made, and I wasn't even happy with that decision at the time. Hahaha. Sometimes, the best things to happen to you are the things you didn't want to happen in the first place.

In this show I used to watch, "Parenthood," the matriarch of the family at one point tells her daughter-in-law, "I've never been so happy to be so wrong about anyone." I can't help but feel that way about the Church sometimes. Everything I knew, or everything I thought I knew, about the church was completely wrong. I'm constantly learning, constantly growing, constantly building my testimony of the restored church of Jesus Christ. And every time I go to the temple, I'm adding another brick to the foundation on which my testimony is mostly built upon. You'll constantly hear missionaries tell people to read the Book of Mormon, to pray about it, and if the Spirit tells them it's true, then that means Joseph Smith was a Prophet, then that means he really did restore the true church of Jesus Christ and all the keys of the Priesthood, and so on. And while I know all of that is true, I think for me, it kind of happened differently. I think I had a testimony of all that, but I don't think it was really solidified until I went to the Gilbert temple. In a way, my testimony worked backwards. I knew that the power of the Atonement I felt in the temple that day was real, I knew that the temple really was the House of the Lord, and I knew that the priesthood was necessary to perform the ordinances inside the temple, and then I knew Joseph Smith restored those keys, and then it confirmed to me that the Book of Mormon was true. For me, it all started with the temple, but it doesn't end there. As Elder J. Ballard Washburn once said many years ago, "we go to the temple to make covenants, but we go home to keep the covenants we have made." I know I must keep pressing forward, doing my best to keep my covenants, to follow the commandments, to be a disciple of Christ in all things and in all places. I just wanted to share my experiences with whoever felt like hearing about it. Haha.

Anyway, I've gone on long enough now.

Wishing you all the best,
          Reeree

Blessed With Spiritual Strength

(previously posted on my Facebook page on February 12th, 2015)

I was reading the book of Mosiah in the #BookOfMormon, and a few scriptures stuck out to me.

Mosiah 24:15 "And now it came to pass that the burdens which were laid upon Alma and his brethren were made light; yea, The Lord did strengthen them that they could bear up their burdens with ease, and they did submit cheerfully to all the will of The Lord."

Mosiah 23:20 "Nevertheless The Lord seeth fit to chasten his people; yea, he trieth their patience and their faith."

Mosiah 23:2 "And The Lord did strengthen them, that the people of king Noah could not overtake them to destroy them."

I know that we experience trials in our lives for a purpose. It is not to punish us, but to test our resilience, test our courage, and to test our faith. When we face adversity, we can find strength with the Father. He will bless us with the strength to make our burdens seem smaller if we only ask Him to. They will not disappear, but they will seem lighter.

#SpiritualThoughtOfTheDay  #ScriptureADayKeepsTheDevilAway #SpiritualStrength #ReadGoodness #ShareGoodness

It's my "Baptiversary!"

A year ago, today, I was baptized and I became a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. I seriously cannot believe that it has been 365 days since then. It simultaneously feels like it was just yesterday and like it was a lifetime ago; I would argue that it feels like a lifetime ago because I was living a different life then. The choices I was making before I got baptized would currently have me on a very different path now had I continued to make those choices.

Last week, when I bore my testimony at our sacrament meeting, I had told my ward that without the temple trip last year, my conversion would've taken longer, or it might not have happened at all. But something my stake president said at our ward conference yesterday made me realize that that is just not true. He said something along the lines of "just as people on earth are sad that you've left when you die; people in heaven are sad when you're born." And it reminded me of this poem Sister Olsen had shared with me (it is so good!), but it also reminded me that I chose to follow God's plan in the pre-mortal life. I was a member of His Church then, and I wanted to come to earth to learn and progress and to follow the Savior and return to Him. I was set out to be a member of this Church from the beginning; it was only a matter of when. Recently, I was reading in the Book of Mormon, and I found a scripture that reiterated this idea for me. "And I bear record that the people of Nephi did seek diligently to restore the Lamanites unto the true faith in God (Enos 1:20). . . ."

I italicized the word "restore" because it really stuck out to me as I was reading this. The word basically means "to return or bring back to its former/original state." So, when I read this, it made me realize that at one point, the Lamanites believed in God. For whatever reason (wickedness, pride, bitterness, etc., I don't remember), the Lamanites had lost their faith in the Father. 

When we are born and cross the veil that separates our Heavenly home from this world, we lose our knowledge and memories of our Heavenly home. We forget our Heavenly Father, we forget we chose to follow Him, and we forget that we were already part of His church. Some of us grew up in the Church, so we are taught about the gospel from a young age, therefore some of us are restored to their faith before others. And some of us, including me, are those "others." We are those who didn't grow up with the gospel in our homes, who didn't know the truth. We needed to be restored to our faith later. 

Sometimes I wonder, "where would I be now if I had been a member sooner?" But I always think about the following three lyrics when I think about the way my life has gone. 

"Thank God for all I missed, because it led me here to this." -Darius Rucker, "This"

"I thank God I didn't get what I thought that I deserved." - Carrie Underwood, "Good in Goodbye"

"Some of God's greatest gifts are unanswered prayers." - Garth Brooks, "Unanswered Prayers"

My life has definitely not gone the way I would've expected it to, but I feel much happier with what I've got than I would've been had I gotten what I thought I wanted then. I know that God has a plan for each of us. He know what He's doing. He sees things differently than we do. We can only see today, but He sees what lies ahead for us. We just have to be patient, and faithful that whatever we're going through will be beneficial for us at some point. Someday, we're going to look back at the trials we're facing today and be glad for them. I never thought I would look back at all the things I've been through, and be able to say that I'm glad it happened. But now, I can. It has made me who I am; which I'd like to think is "a whole lot of tender, and little bit tough." :) 

I guess what I'm trying to say is that I'm glad I've been restored to my true faith. It's been a full year of this LDS life, and it has been a great one! And I know that while life not get any easier, it will still get better from here on out because I have the gospel!

Some picture-quotes that are food for thought!

Those "Sidewalk Prophets"

On Wednesday, I had the opportunity to have the YSA Sisternaries over for dinner.  I was so disappointed because I spent a good part of the day preparing my food several hours before the time I knew they would show up so it would all be perfect. And it was not. The food was still pretty decent, but it really got to me, and it was hard to enjoy their company during the actual dinner because I had my head so wrapped around the fact that the meal I had prepared didn't come out just right.

But, right after, I went with them to teach a lesson in Van Nuys. One the way there, we were listening to this mix CD I made them which contains music that "strikes me spiritual." Most of the songs were very obviously so, because they used words having directly to do with the gospel. But there are a few songs that are in no direct way spiritual, but they bring out the Spirit for me. One of the songs on there is "Jesus Take the Wheel" by Carrie Underwood. Sisters French and Forbush were both singing along, when the latter said "I want to go do karaoke." And Sister French responded with, "Ha. Carrie-okie!" It was so funny! :)
Anyway, the guy they were teaching was referred to them by some other Elders in the area. He didn't actually let us in his house, so we all just stood on his doorstep talking in the dark. It was really hard to see his face, making it hard to tell if he was actually understanding what the Sisters were saying or just saying he understood. Especially considering the fact that every time they asked him a question, he would only give one- or two-word answers. But after they would explain one thing about our Church, he would ask to hear more. It was pretty awesome.

At one point they asked him if he believed in the prophets in The Bible, and if he believed in the possibility of prophets on the earth today. And he said that there could be a possibility. And then the Sisters asked me to share my testimony of how I came to know if there was a prophet on the earth today, and how I came to know that President Thomas S. Monson is the true and living prophet of the Church of Jesus Christ. And I told him that I prayed about it, and I got this feeling in my heart that felt right. And by reading the scriptures in both the Bible and in the Book of Mormon, and then going and reading the words President Monson has given, and how, to me, they were the same words I've read in the scriptures, just in modern terms. He testified of the same things that prophets of old had testified about. But, here's the embarrassing part, when I was trying to say "Thomas S. Monson," I called him "Spencer." I know that Spencer is his middle name, but I felt like a total idiot for forgetting his name, his first name! I felt like I had screwed up so bad. In my head, I was thinking, "Yeah, I'm sure this sounds questionable now if I can't even get the prophet's name right!" But it didn't seem to affect him negatively, because he still seemed interested.

Then, baptism came up, and he said he might be interested in the idea of being baptized, of course, after he can know for himself if any of this is true. But he told us he had been baptized before. When he said that, I immediately thought of the scripture that talks about how without the proper priesthood authority, the ordinances performed are kind of all for naught. I felt like I should just let them do the talking at that point, and Sister Forbush handled it so well! She talked about priesthood power, but he didn't seem to comprehend her "missionary lingo," so I tried to break it down in simpler terms, and then (I think) he got it. And he kept asking them to share more with them. It was pretty great. He even asked them how long would he have wait before he could be a "sidewalk prophet" like they are. Haha, not quite, but pretty close! I think it was a really good lesson. It was hard to gauge his interest, or the sincerity of his interest, at first, but I really do believe he is genuinely interested. He even agreed to come to sacrament meeting on Sunday. 

The Sisters are so inspiring. It's so great to see them at work. I know they believe with every fiber of their being that the things that they are "preaching" are true, as do I. Every time I read my scriptures, with real intent, with the desire to learn something from them, my testimony grows. Every time I feed the missionaries, and they share a spiritual thought with me, and it is exactly what I needed to hear without having them known prior to then, my testimony grows. Every time I get to share my beliefs with others, whether it is with the Sisters or on my own, my testimony grows. I am so, so grateful that I opened the door to the "sidewalk prophets" who were roaming through my neighborhood over a year ago. It's changed me for the better. And every time I help the Sisters teach a lesson, I hope that those people will see that, and want that for themselves. Recently, I started re-reading the Book of Mormon. It has been so great. The first time around I was really skeptical, but now, that I know it's the Word of God, I'm reading it with a much more open mind, and an open heart. Anyway, there's this chapter where the patriarch of the family, Lehi, has a vision of the tree of life, and its fruit basically represent God's love. And the following verse stuck out to me. 

1 Nephi 8:12 - "And as I partook of the fruit thereof it filled my soul with exceedingly great joy; wherefore, I began to be desirous that my family should partake of it also; for I knew that it was desirable above all other fruit."

If you experienced something as amazing as that, wouldn't you want to share it with your family? Lehi had the desire to share it his actual family; his wife. his sons, and their wives. When I read this, I thought about my immediate and extended family, but I also thought abut my Heavenly family. WE are children of a Heavenly Family, and I want us all to return to Him. I want everyone to be able to taste of the fruit. I want everyone to experience that wonderful and eternal love for themselves. To not share it would be selfish, and well, that wouldn't be very Christ-like, would it?

:)

My Sister got Baptized!!

Sister Hacker and Sister Naylor broke the news to me on the third, which was Fast Sunday. And my sister had decided to get baptized on her birthday. So, she turned 17 today! Unfortunately, Sister Hacker got transferred yesterday, so she wasn't able to attend Sofia's baptism. But Sister Baxter is super nice!!

My mom and her boyfriend were about 20 minutes late to the baptism (no surprise there), and we had to stall some. My other sister and her boyfriend even went! I was super surprised to see they actually all came. It was amazing! The speakers gave really good talks on the Holy Ghost and Baptism. And the Missionary Moment was done by Elder Hansen (he baptized me a little over six months ago!) and his companion Elder Smith (I think). Sofia gave her testimony.

Sofia and Elder Burgess

Elder Pisa, Sofia, and Elder Burgess

Sister Naylor, Sofia, and Sister Baxter

Then we all went out for pupusas. :)

Fasting + Praying = Powerful Stuff!

It's Fast Sunday! It's my favorite day of the month! I love hearing my fellow brothers and sisters bear their testimonies and I love sharing mine as well. Since I've been baptized (which will have been six months ago this coming Saturday!), I've shared my testimony every month except June because, at the time, I was still working at Six Flags, and they were scheduling me on Sundays. But I think it's pretty good nonetheless. :)

Anyway, today I bore my testimony at the Reseda family ward. I talked a bit about the fact that because I'm a convert, there is a lot of stuff that I don't completely understand or that I can't explain to people when they ask me about the Church. But I have faith in those things because I know that the Church is true. And even though I don't understand those things, I know that they are the right things. I also talked a bit about how I've been praying for rain and cooler weather because we are experiencing a really bad drought and dry spell here in California, and my prayers were answered on Saturday night. After sacrament meeting was over, one of the members came up to me to share how she is a convert, and was baptized over 20 years ago. She said she loved my testimony because she understands exactly how I feel because she felt it then, too. She testified to me that someday I'll come to understand and to know other aspects of the church as she has.

As the chapel was being cleared out, the Reseda sisternaries and my sister Sofia stuck around for a bit.... But I'll come back to this... I left to YSA.

During the YSA ward sacrament meeting, I was listening to the testimonies being shared. And even though I had already bore my testimony at the Reseda ward, I was getting this prompting to share my testimony with this ward as well. I told the ward how much I love Fast Sundays because of the Spirit that is felt on those Sundays and because of the testimonies. I told them that whenever Fast Sundays come around, the first thoughts in my prayers are that my family would open their hearts up to the Church and that they'll become members some day. I then shared why the sisternaries and Sofia stuck around. . . They informed me that Sofia has made the decision to get baptized!! I testified of the power of fasting and prayers. I know Heavenly Father provides an answer to our prayer. It may not be the answer we were hoping for, and it might not even be an immediate answer, but we can always expect an answer.
(P.S. One of the girls, who visits our ward on the regular until she goes back to BYU-Idaho, told me she was grateful I bore my testimony. She told me she enjoys coming to YSA on Fast Sunday because my testimony is always a highlight of her visit. She is so sweet! And I'm glad I followed the prompting of the Spirit!)

Needless to say, I am super excited that my sister has made this decision. The other day I saw this video called, "Pioneers: Followers of Jesus Christ." And it's the condensed version of a talk called, "Modern Pioneers" that was given by Elder Dallin H. Oaks in 1989. I read the talk and I saw the video, and they made me realized that I am a modern-day pioneer. I am the first in my family to accept the Gospel into my life, and I am the first convert. By following the commandments, and by honoring my baptismal covenants, I have been setting an example for my sister, and now she has made the decision to become a member as well. The best part about this, to me, is that I wasn't trying to be an example to her. I was just trying to better at being Christ-like because I promised Him I would try to be; which to me, really just reinforces that idea of being a good person even when you think no one is watching. Someone could be watching and you might be an example to them. It's better to be a good example than a bad one!

Great day!

Today was an awesome day! I went up the Wiley Canyon Ward to see my friend EmRod give her farewell talk there, and to see Sister Kemp!! It was awesome (and a little awkward for me... haha but I honestly don't know why). 

From there, EmRod, my sister, and I went to the YSA ward. Good times there!

EmRod and I drove to my house, and dropped my sister off. Gilbert came with us. We ate a ton of ice cream. Then we all went down to the Los Angeles Temple Visitors' Center for a fireside. It was hosted/led by Maclain Nelson, who is an actor and producer. He produced and played Elder Propst in The Saratov Approach. It is such a good movie. The presence of the Spirit was so strong! Anyway, he's a really nice guy and I look forward to seeing more of his work. :)

Maclain Nelson and I :)

A Simple Sacrifice I Was Happy to Make

I have been dying to go hiking for the last couple of weeks. The girl who is now in charge of the ward FHE activities planned a nighttime hike for yesterday. I was really excited. To hike under the stars with my friends sounded awesome.
Literally, as I was leaving my house to start heading over to the girl's house (because we were all meeting there to carpool), I saw that I had a missed call from the Reseda Sisternaries around 7:40 pm. So, I called them back, and they sounded a little sad through the phone. They were wondering if I would help them teach a lesson at 8:00 pm. It was 7:50 pm. I told them I would help them, but I quickly realized I would probably be late to the night hike, or I'd end up missing it altogether.
Since I was already in the car, I told them I would just drive to the investigator's house and meet them there. It turns out he lives a few blocks away from me. I probably could have walked. Haha. It would've been a little faster since it took forever to find parking on the street. This investigator is actually getting baptized this coming Saturday. So, the Sisternaries just taught him about sacrament and what it means, and what it could do for us. They asked me to share my experience with baptism.

I got baptized 163 days ago, so on February 9th. :) I had decided that I wanted to get baptized on January 31st, well, I realized I had no reason not to get baptized; but I don't think that counts as desire. But when I went through the Gilbert, Arizona temple during their open house on both the 31st of January, and the 1st of February, I had such an incredible experience while I was in the temple. I felt all my burdens lifted, and I had a moment of clarity; and that's when I knew that the Church was true. Once I knew the Church was true, I knew I wanted to be a member of it!
On the 1st, after I had gotten home, the YSA Sisternaries came over to my house to talk about getting baptized. They told me that Sister Kemp would be getting transferred on the 25th. Basically, they said, "you don't have to get baptized right away, but if you want Sister Kemp to be there, it has to be soon. But, no pressure." Haha. Okay, they didn't say it like that. But that's how I took it. So I agreed to get baptized the following week on the 9th.
Even though I knew I wanted to get baptized, I felt rushed. I had second thoughts about doing it on that day right up until the last second when I got "dunked" into the water. But as soon as I was, I felt relieved. I knew I made the right choice. And I haven't looked back since. It has to be, quite honestly, the best decision I've ever  made because it's changed my life so much. And it has all been for the better. That choice has affected my life in more ways than I can count.

Obviously, I gave the investigator the short version of that story. But he liked that I said I was having second-thoughts about it, but that I don't regret it. I think maybe he was having second-thoughts about it, but was strengthened by my testimony; at least, that's what it seemed like to me. I hope I can be there on Saturday for his baptism, but I might have to work.

The lesson ended at 9:00 pm. I called the girl, and she said they were still up on the mountain. I thought, "maybe I can still make it?" I drove up there, and I didn't have service so I couldn't call someone to meet me so I could join them. So, I sat there for a bit, looked at the stars for a few minutes, and then I drove home.

Even though I wasn't able to hang out with the YSA, I don't regret helping the Sisternaries. I love helping them teach lessons, and I think the investigator enjoyed my testimony.
Likewise, even though I didn't think I was ready to get baptized so soon after having realized I even wanted to get baptized in the first place, I'm glad I did it then. I'm glad I didn't wait. I don't regret that either. I know everything worked out according to God's plan. :)

To Serve or Not to Serve, That is the Question

A little while before I had gotten baptized, I had a dream that I was serving a mission and teaching investigators in Spanish. I made the "mistake" of telling one of my friends from Church. At the temple one night, she commented on how my bag looks like such a "missionary" bag. I guess she had told Bishop Patton about this dream I had, because he then made a comment about how I would be serving a mission next March.
A few days later, the Sisternaries came over (for what I presume was supposed to be my new-member lessons), and asked about this dream. So I told them about it, and they began to tell me about the blessings I could receive from serving a mission.

Fast forward a few weeks, and I'm getting my patriarchal blessing. The Patriarch told me to fast and pray, so I did. I don't know why, but in my prayer, I asked to know whether I should serve a mission. And, boy, did I get my answer!
Over the next few days, I start to have doubts, and I convince myself, "The Patriarch probably tells everyone to serve a mission. After all, this church is known for service and spreading the gospel."

I turned to the scriptures, and I found Doctrine and Covenants Section ten, Verses eight and nine, which say,
"But, behold, I say unto you, that you must study out in your mind; then you must ask me if it be right, and if it is right I will cause that your bosom shall burn within you; therefore, you shall feel that is is right.
"But if it be not right you shall have no such feelings, but you shall have a stupor of thought that shall cause you to forget the thing which is wrong; therefore, you can not write that which is sacred save it be given you from me."

After reading that, I knew that the Lord truly does want me to serve a mission because I have felt it in my "bosom." And verse nine says that if it's not right, you will forget about it; but I can't seem to forget about it.
But I didn't want to go out and serve a mission just because I know that it's what the Lord wants. I didn't want that to be the only reason. As I struggled to find reasons why I wanted to go on a mission, I continued to read my scriptures. In Mosiah, chapter 2, verses 17 through 19 further convinced me why I should go.
"And behold, I tell you these things that ye may learn wisdom; that ye may learn that when ye are in the service of your fellow beings ye are only in the service of your God.
"Behold, ye have called me your king; and if I, whom ye call your king, do labor to serve you, then ought not ye labor to serve one another?
"And behold also, if I, whom ye call your king, who has spent his days in your service, and has been in the service of God, do merit any thanks from you, O how you ought to thank your heavenly King!"

Moroni 7:47 tells us "charity is the pure love of Christ." I know charity involves serving one another. I know that if I truly love Christ, I must be willing to serve my fellow brothers and sisters, not just for eighteen months while I serve a mission, but forever. I know that not only does it make my Heavenly Father happy to see me serving my brothers and sisters, but it'll make me happy, too (Finding Joy through Loving Service).

I love reading conference talks. I have found so much insight, so many answers to my questions in the talks the leaders of the Church give. Reading Elder M. Russel Ballard's October 2008 conference talk (The Truth of God Shall Go Forth), I found the following:
"We are all needed to finish the work that was begun by those pioneering Saints over 175 years ago and carried out through the subsequent decades by faithful Saints of every generation. We need to believe as they believed. We need to work as they worked. We need to serve as they served. We need to overcome as they overcame."
I know that Satan is trying really hard to convince me not to go on a mission. But I also know that "no unhallowed hand can stop the work from progressing." No matter what happens, the gospel will always be heard. I know I'm going to serve a mission, and I'll probably be going out into the field in about a year. I know that it might be hard; I know that if, as missionaries, we are going to be representatives of Christ, we are going to experience a lot of what Christ experienced. But I know that it will also be worth it.
Helping the Sisternaries now (and not only from the YSA ward, but from the Reseda family ward as well), has been such a blessing. I have truly come to understand love better. I have grown to love those investigators. I have become more selfless in the process, and it truly does make me happy. Every time I help the Sisternaries teach a lesson, I cannot wait until the next lesson. I love it! I honestly feel like teaching lessons, and being a missionary, is something I was born to do. I know that the Lord put that in my patriarchal blessing for a reason!

(Not So) New Member Lessons

Last Friday, I had a job interview at Chipotle. I fasted, and I prayed a whole lot. But I found myself feeling doubtful, and lacking in confidence. Needless to say, I didn't get hired by that place.  :(

Yesterday, I was checking my email, and another Chipotle had asked me to go to in for an interview today at 11:30.

I ended up waking up really early this morning. Okay, so it wasn't that early. It was around 8:00 am, but the day before, I woke up around 11:00 am, so it is early in comparison. ;)

Seeing as I had a few hours to kill, I starting going through my scriptures. Recently, I've been trying to erase my old scripture marker marks and re-do them with my new scripture markers. The old ones aren't very bright, and I don't like the way they look. The new ones are so much better! Anyway, today I was re-marking up the Book of Enos.

Enos 1:15 - "Whatsoever thing ye shall ask in faith, believing that ye shall receive in the name of Christ, ye shall receive it."

This scripture really struck a chord in me. I realized that last week, I had prayed, and I had asked for help in getting the job, but I doubted whether I would get it. And I tried to argue with myself that it wasn't that I lacked faith in Him, and that I only lacked faith in myself. I was afraid that I would blow it. Then I remembered "faith is the opposite of fear." I know that if we have complete faith in Jesus Christ, we need not be afraid of anything, not even of our own weaknesses and flaws.

So, I prayed about the interview today. I put my complete faith in the Lord and in the Savior. And I killed that interview. I am so grateful for that. I know that I was blessed today. That scripture was exactly what I needed to see/hear today.

I'm sure I'll find out soon enough whether I got the job, but I feel super good about it. :)


So, almost six months in, and I'm just barely getting started with the new-member lessons. Haha I guess they didn't think I would need the refresher course. I met the Sisternaries at the Pattons' house around 6. The Sisters and Sister Patton just taught me, and had me "teach" them what I've learned, about the Restoration. It was pretty cool. I shared my experience with the scripture in Enos with them. Sister Patton told me that my "countenance" has changed since she met me in January. I definitely feel that I've changed on the inside, and I guess it's showing on the outside, too. :) Which remind me of one of my favorite quotes: "When you choose to follow Christ, you choose to be changed." - President Ezra Taft Benson

I was also super fortunate to have the opportunity to help the Reseda Sisternaries teach a lesson today. I find it so humbling that one of the reasons I was initially against joining the Church was because I thought everyone had to serve missions, and I was super against that, at the time. Now, I'm willingly giving up my time to help the sisternaries do their missionary work, and I'm even contemplating serving a mission myself. See how much I've changed since December?!

I gave my first sacrament talk!!

I asked Bishop Patton if I could give a talk a few weeks ago, and he said yes! I spoke yesterday during sacrament meeting! Despite it being really short, I think it went really well!

I started off by sharing a verse from one of my favorite songs, "Buy This Town," by Lori McKenna. "If I could buy your pain, first I'd buy the great big sea; and I'd put that pain inside a box, and bury it so deep. If I could buy you back, the years you worked yourself to death, I would buy and waste your suffering 'til there wasn't any left." 

I then related this to Jesus Christ and the Atonement. I talked a bit about how it's common knowledge that Jesus Christ atoned for our sins, and how it's mentioned in Mosiah 14:5, and in 1 John 2:2. Then I went onto to say how He didn't just suffer four our sins and transgressions, but how he also suffered for the inequalities, the unfairness, the pain, the anguish, weaknesses etc., that we feel or experience. I shared a Timothy J. Dyches quote; "If you feel unclean, unloved, unhappy, unworthy, or unwhole; Remember, all that is unfair about life can be made right through the Atonement of Jesus Christ." I said that the Atonement isn't just for sinners; it is for all of us. It is there to comfort and reassure us, to help us bear our burdens, and it can mend what, for us, is beyond repair. The Atonement not only has the power to free us from our transgressions, or the power to comfort our pains; it also has the power to strengthen our weaknesses. The Atonement not only has a cleansing power or a comforting power; it also has an enabling power. I shared an example of this that I found in Mosiah, chapter 24, where Alma and his brethren were being persecuted by Amulon. In verses 14 and 15, it says that the Lord told Alma that He would ease their burdens, and then the burdens were! "The Lord did strengthen them that they could bear their burdens with ease..."

I then talked about how to fully take advantage of the powers of the atonement, or how to activate the powers. First, remember where you came from and where you are headed. By following the plan the Lord has made for you, following the commandments, keeping the covenants you made, and having an eternal perspective, we are able to meet our Heavenly Father again. The Atonement can help push upward and forward towards our eternal goal.  Second, we must feast upon the word of God. In 2 Nephi 34:3, it says, "Feast upon the word of Christ; For behold, the words of Christ will tell you all that ye should do." The use of the word "feast" is not accidental or by happenstance. The Lord doesn't want us to take "nibbles" of His word. He wants us to have all we can "eat." I didn't share this scripture, but I really like 2 Nephi 4:15-16. I know our Heavenly Father wants us to delight in the scriptures, and also really ponder on them. He wants us to take them to heart. Third, read/listen to talks given by church leaders. Fourth, go to the temple. Fifth, exercise faith in Jesus Christ. Sixth, sincerely repent. Seventh, be baptized. Eighth, receive the gift of the Holy Ghost. Ninth, follow the teachings of Christ for the rest of your life.

Then I bore my testimony of how I've felt or used the Atonement in my life.

I was super nervous, but I did enjoy it. I don't want to go back up to the pulpit any time soon. I don't know much about any other subject relating to the gospel. But then again, having to give a talk would give me another reason to want to learn more. :)




If you'd like to read the talks or articles I read in preparation for my talk, click on the links below.

1. 6 Ways to Activate the Atonement
2. The Atonement of Jesus Christ - His Life and Teachings
3. Of Regrets and Resolutions
4. The Atonement and the Journey of Mortality
5. Beauty for Ashes: The Atonement of Jesus Christ

Mormon Night at Dodger Stadium | The First Sister Missionaries

Today has been a GREAT day!
I am NOT a fan of the Dodgers. #SFGIANTS #AllDayEveryday
BUT I went to Mormon Night at Dodger Stadium with my ward, and it was so much fun! #BonusPoints, the Dodgers lost! I'm sad I missed the first pitch because Elder Bednar threw it, and he is my favorite apostle.
But I think I want to go to Mormon Night next year, too! And maybe, if God is willing, they'll be playing the Giants! ;)


Earlier today, though, before the game, I saw this really great video about some Church history, and it's about how the Church was inspired to let women join the men in the field. I've been debating whether I should serve a mission. This video inspired me! Elizabeth McCune didn't realize what a strong impact she had at the time, but she made such a huge difference!

I am so grateful for this Church! I love history. It is one of my passions. I feel so blessed that I get to learn new parts of American history because it is Mormon history, and as far as I know, it is hardly mentioned, other than in Utah or Idaho where the Mormon presence is overwhelmingly strong! Haha!



Watch the video by clicking on the link below!

• Elizabeth McCune and The First Sister Missionaries